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Re: Shoals

Post by Smallcorners » Mon Nov 26, 2018 1:24 pm

The sheet is in the box on the Little Trouble, the emotions embedded upon it are mixed, but there is a distinct note of fury under the calm.

How is Ghaal walking free? I know I got angry on seeing him, poor Rando, I know he felt my reaction as he immediately sent me a message to redirect my attention. By the time I returned home from Jato he was calm in that sort of "I am going to be dangerous about this...later" way of his.

Rando has a way of reminding me is not exactly the right word as I center when I use the force intentionally, but to balance. Yes, balance is the right word considering I usually need to concentrate to center, but I can balance just by having him near. I believe I do the same for him, create balance, clarity.

Woke up at some point with Koga curled up with us, she must have come home sometime before dawn and needed the contact. I didn't mind, snuggling is something I have learned to do, not intimate in a sexual way, but in an emotional one. There is fragility here still, but we are working on it.

Megan took the news I told her in a barely concealed panic, though she wished me well, not sure about the us part. She did think I was crazy, but then I wondered if she had truly seen us together? Perhaps not, she was very bedazzled by Al to notice other people were connecting too. However she passed on a warning, a suggestion, that we not make our wedding public. The more private the better, though her word was elope, otherwise I might be saying vows while dodging blaster bolts.

We protect our own. However part of that protection is not being foolish, Par will scout for other places to have the ceremony itself. I suppose the reception can remain at Keeper's, considering that Rando and I are pretty much agreed to do cake and well wishes first, then skedaddle to let the others party the night away. The reception is also going to be open to anyone, well almost anyone.

I did not tell her we were living in Agathon, but I am not that hard to find, nor really is he. I am glad however to have the Little Trouble more than flight worthy so we can avoid Imperial space as much as possible.

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Re: Shoals

Post by Smallcorners » Sun Dec 02, 2018 9:23 am

There is a weariness to the feel of the paper, and a growing maturity, perhaps an understanding of something once romanticized. There is determination there too, and a gentle strength. This piece of semi-fancy stationary, bearing the header for a hotel in Hanna, is in a box on the Little Trouble.

Finally a moment to sit and write, he is sprawled across the bed, pillow tossed on the floor, the sheet twisted about his torso. I want to remember this sight, of him laying there with his hair mussed, and eyes half open watching me write, but content to lay still for a moment longer. We have a long day ahead of us.

We had a long day behind us.

I was pulled out of Dantooine and tossed onto an NR cruiser as soon as it was clear we would not hold the planet, my job was clear, help the wounded. And there were so many. The attack on our home was brutal and extraordinarily hard fought on both sides, in the end, they had fresh reinforcements and we had none. Some where I must have collapsed and been passed off, because I awoke in a pond,the Little Trouble humming nearby and Rando overseeing the loading of supplies and people.

We have been doing that since. Though many of the people we are carrying are the most vulnerable, or injured, those needing care. We have also been ferrying supplies to the various camps as we check on them. Dantooine, Chandrila, Tanaab, Naboo, and one brief stop on Endor for a few hours by me while he was busy wrangling senators.

He has done most of the flying, I have done most of the peopling while we are aloft. Of the animals that we had with us a week ago when we left for Naboo, only Nasha is still in flight, the canids are in a safe place and I expect we will collect them once we carry more supplies than injured. While they all can protect, Nasha has the advantage that she can be ridden, or pull a cart as needed. Not that she likes to, but she will if asked. The Little Trouble's life support system is robust, but the less it can be strained the better.

The other day, when I woke in that pond, it was not an easy wakening. I was not sure why until yesterday. Somehow Fazza had gotten left behind when we pulled out, and he was taken, then slain. It was his passing I had felt I suppose. I don't know the details, or how Bywing got them to tell to Z, but Alisyad wants it looked into. How did he know Allison had taken our gardener? It would explain why Dantooine, and Agathon have been harder to approach since the take over.

Amusement here, love, a brightening after the growing sadness of the last paragraph.

He is making faces. I think he is getting better at reading me though he has always been perceptive there is a fading line from the pen across the paper as if her hand had been pushed aside

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Re: Shoals

Post by Smallcorners » Wed Dec 05, 2018 1:25 pm

The same stationary for the hotel in Hanna City. The feel on the sheet is mostly calm with an underlying unease and restlessness. This sheet will join the others on the Little Trouble.

Supplies, rounds, supplies, contacts. In between watching him soak up the senatorial experience from Ivunuvi's box. She is still on Dantooine, refusing to leave Agathon while she feels she can do some good there with her presence. In the meantime I get to flash my ID with the senator's aide symbol and get into the chambers with 'approved guests' to keep up with the goings on.

The hotel staff are starting to get used to Nasha trotting behind me. They appreciate the lack of raucousness in the salon when we are in there from the visiting crews, something about 200 kilos of cat could do that to a place. The staff have also expressed surprise at how quiet, tidy, and friendly she is to those that she learns should be there. One of them commented that when I am playing on stage that they would swear she purrs in tune and on key!

Getting wounded off of Dantooine is beginning to prove problematic. Allison, I mean Alhai Paven, has been spotted on the planet, and in a Holonet report on Dantooine. It seems she is taking no prisoners, and it is getting harder to get through the blockade. I would rather not show off the Little Trouble's new trick yet, but it might just be a matter of time now. I should see if we can get a fresh set of pass codes from Alisyad? That might ease some of the passage.

General Anishor has called for a squad meeting tonight, I need to check the secures later for where and when.

Tomorrow is another GRC Race in Broken Bridge on Corellia. This is an evening race, and afterwards Rando hinted at a trip to Nashal. Somehow I am not sure he is wanting to find wrix or panther kittens, so I wonder what the other reason is for going?

Do I mind that he likes to have more than one reason to do something? No, not really. We were talking about the personality points of the Chandrilians, and NR leaders in general. He said that in the end those that are pragmatic will eventually lead, but it will be the idealists that will get them to that point. He tends towards pragmatism, and I tend towards idealism.

I wonder if I can lure him out of the city long enough for a picnic lunch?

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Re: Shoals

Post by Smallcorners » Fri Dec 07, 2018 3:35 pm

Same Hanna City hotel stationery, for now this is tucked into one of Nasha's packs. It will eventually get to the box on the ship.

Dathomir did not go well, our losses were significant. What is it that we are suddenly lacking? Or has the shattered factions of the Empire started to work together? Their unity is a terrifying thought.

I am having many terrifying thoughts lately, am I getting them from him in exchange for the calm? Perhaps it is part of the balance? Which would make sense, I should accept his worries and fears as my own so we can work together better in our lives.

A new worry surfaced last night after the race. Rando noticed a Transdoshan watching me, and somewhat him, later he caught a glimpse of this same being when we went to Nashal. Probably using the same methods, Azrathiel also traced us to Nashal to warn us about this hunter. For hunter is what they are, and I am their prey. He said they came up to him after we left wanting more information about me, and that they were acting agitated, vicious.

We took some steps to misdirect and cover our steps after Azrathiel left us, though that means a day or two without the Little Trouble at our disposal. I had the ship's codes altered again, but not the registration. I can ask the EUoC rep to bury my name deeper in the files instead.

This hunter might put a crimp in my plans to go to Megan's reception on Jato in a couple days. Of course right after Rando said he would consider going. He says he will not hide, though he is careful. I insist that if he will not, I will not as I will be beside him. Which has instilled a bit more caution in his life, and perhaps a certain restlessness. He has yet to learn that caution does not need to mean keep the ones you love away from everything all the time.

Which returns me back to my involvement in the squad that covers this area of the galaxy. He is not happy about it, but he understands it. I think if there was another alternative than stepping onto that battlefield he would encourage me on that path. At the same time, I am encouraging him to have a greater part, even if it is not on that same field.


To do:
-Find a dress for the reception, even if I don't go. Until I get home I want more than four outfits, not counting my racing leathers or armor. He could use a few things too.
-Find an apartment or small house in Hanna or Nayali if we are going to be here long term. The hotel does have suites, but they are expensive and the extra privacy would be welcome. Besides, I miss cooking.
-Get Rando his own Senator's Aide ID for the Senate. It is interesting to go, but I also need to do other work.
-Life day gift for Rando. I found things for the dads and mom, but my mate is much harder.
-Check on his eye appointment, he might want to put this off.
-Contact his folks, maybe we can go there for Life day instead? It would be nice to see them and Koga again.
-Give Nasha a proper bath.

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Re: Shoals

Post by Smallcorners » Thu Dec 13, 2018 12:52 pm

The paper is still from the Hotel in Hanna, some errand or other had her forget it on the table in the living area of their apartment in Hanna, though it will eventually get to the box on the Little Trouble.

To do:
-Dress and suit for Megan & Al's thing accomplished.
-Our own space in Hanna accomplished. I am starting to understand better how being part of the Entertainer's union is beneficial. I am working them a lot, even so they tell me that I am not anywhere near the most demanding, and probably one of the most polite.
-Rando's Senate ID accomplished! Beware Senators, my love can freely prowl amongst you now.
-Life day gift... I handed him the packet of information that came in from my contacts about Ord Padron. Okay, so I planned on the Sabel being a wedding gift, but the ship is in more danger than I thought and we need to move now to secure it. Until he reads the packet, he still does not know this is about the ship, but Handsome is clever and what other reason would I have for wanting to go out there? Still should find him something personal, or smaller than a ship personal.
-Eye appointment. Why cant people just return a comm?
-Tanaab is under Imperial entanglement, we will figure something out.
-For the moment Nasha is not covered in sand.

Wedding to do:
-Location - Where ever it happens. The Imperials are making a huge push lately and far fewer places are feeling safe enough for this on anything larger than an extremely personal scale. Please not a battlefield?
-Officiator - Still hunting Maltas...
-Guests at Ceremony - not changed, unless we really do elope, in which case Jenn drives the getaway ship. In a dress.
-Date - Still after Life day
-Guests at reception - Same, though might turn into who can we smuggle cake to?
-Dresses - Must do this still
-Rings - Or other symbol, these can be engraved... I think Jaz can arrange this too, or Rayne, depending on who we can eventually get to meet.
-Cake - I was not kidding in that it should be smuggleable. Is that a word? Is now. Leaning towards the creamy, fruity, but not too sweet.
-Food - Edible, easy. Maybe I should start getting containers and just hand out bags of food and cake.
-Reception - Probably a picnic in a cave at this rate.
-Music - We will make our own.
-Wedding Party - We still have Jenn. Cari is caught on Dantooine as is Chewie.
-Suits - see note under dresses. And no Armor... maybe armor.
-Honeymoon - Same as before, hopefully? A tour of places no one else is. That is all he will tell me.
-Animals - Nasha, Choku, Rioux and the pup are with us out of necessity and the fact they already were when Dantooine was taken. Ivu is wrangling the rest.
-Ship - The Little Trouble is kept ready for the maximum run at all times these days. His ship? The flying cargo hold? It still looks terrible, but... We will take the Trouble.
-Paperwork - I still have Ivu's, Alisyad might need to redo whatever he was going to do.
-Vows - I will write mine, but lately it is down to one word: Live.
-Breathe - I look at my lists and I can see I might be having a bit of a panic, really need to not project that. We have time, right? Live.

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Re: Shoals

Post by Smallcorners » Sat Dec 22, 2018 4:50 am

The paper was from her stash at Dantooine, the feel of it was a quiet joy from being home tempered with an awareness of the danger she had put them in by insisting on being there. This would eventually get to the box on the Little Trouble, but perhaps not for a couple days, until then it is folded and setting on the table by her side of the bed.

We are home, even if only for a couple nights, we are here. Dantooine. For me this is a place that I know I belong, have known since that first time Alisyad brought us here and asked if I was hearing the planet talk to me? Yes. Such a strange thing to know, to understand. Dantooine is a living thing and it welcomed me back.

This past week Alisyad and I have been purposely practicing the part of my talent that we all know could absolutely kill if it got out of hand. Yet we are not trying to use it to kill, rather the lessons are on controlling the feedback so I wont cause a death, but still can defend myself. This is different from what was asked of me when I was a little girl at the opera before my father hid us away. Different from the same use in Academy. For those times I was not pulling back the emotions I was sending, merely enhancing the desired feeling through song.

I cannot send my own emotions like this, we have tried. My fathers and Rando can feel an echo of how I am feeling when I 'speak' to them. They can feel clearly when I touch them or very close, but I while I can share, I cannot directly change what they are feeling. Some empaths can directly and at a distance, my talent is different, rare and unusual due to the handicaps I have.

So how do I describe this? I can gather an emotion from another person enhance it strengthen it, and send it back out to them or to anyone around. The stronger the emotion, the stronger the feedback. So I could loop a mere vague sad feeling to utter crushing depression in a few cycles, not just back to the person I took the original emotion from, but to a crowd of people around me including myself.

Our practice was on focusing to one person, shielding myself from the feedback while still working it, stopping the feedback. The practices are exhausting and I am not even really using the Force yet. This is just me. The Force creates a stronger effect over a larger area. What I am using the Force for is to try and shield myself, then to send to ground the excess power.

More practice, centering, shielding, grounding. I can center now, but I still need to hum or sing to find it as my center is over my head, maybe I should have been taller? There is a benefit to this in that those that are trying to harm me have a tendency to swing, or shoot high. Alisyad calls it my halo.

While we now know what shape my shield works best as, that does not mean I can get into it easily. I read the world constantly, the shield muffles or blocks, most of what I can read. Like walking about with a knitted cap over your eyes. You can sort of see, but not really. Grounding is not hard, but something that needs to be done with some thought. For that is returning power to either the ground, or to another. In this case I would be trying to release emotionally charged power, and I need to be careful to not not harm anyone in the process, or imbue the area around me with what I was doing.

Alisyad has had to rethink the process of training this a few times. Grixter tried to compare me to Bastila. I doubt I will ever be able to have such a range, but I might have more intensity the closer one is in proximity. Mine seems to be a roughly a circle somewhere between 500 and 600 feet with me at the center. Like her I am not able to move on my own while in a feedback. I can move while in Focus, but not the other.

I can practice the centering, the shielding, the grounding, the focus and somewhat on breaking it. Will knows I need all the help I can get on just those things, but this specific practice needs at least two people. Alisyad has certain words that he uses, almost like a phrase that is attached to an emotional one to break my focus. Rando's way is different, I am not sure how to explain how he can cut through it other than he is my balance. Maybe he will be my 'rock' someday. Par has to work a bit more to get me out of focus, but he can with enough time.

Here is it almost dawn, I have been watching him sleep next to me for hours. So much for waking him with bacon, at this point I am hoping to be up before the Festival starts.

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Re: Shoals

Post by Smallcorners » Wed Dec 26, 2018 10:24 am

The page is tucked into the box on the Little Trouble with the previous ones.

Such a busy few days, this Life Day.

The Festival went well, and while it was a bit subdued, everyone there had fun. I did run into Imperials, but the commander this day was Ansasor and they dared not cross him thus for the most part we were not bothered. Even so we were not going to press our luck by causing any trouble, bringing any more attention to ourselves. We stayed our two nights, said our goodbyes, and left before the rotation changed.

During the Festival Rando pulled me away, asking me to ride with him for a while, I was not going to argue with the man! He brought me to a bluff that overlooked the river from Agro. Below us, all around the plains rolled away, in the far distance to one side were the mountains, to the other the the small sea. The skies for the moment were clear and the colors magical. He proposed again, up there, asking me to marry him on that little hilltop. Yes!

He thinks he is not romantic. If this is him not being romantic, I am in trouble if he ever figures out how to be.

We went to to the Life Day cease fire party in Coronet the day after. It was exhausting, and not just for me. There were so many people there, yet it was still entertaining. Again, we were surrounded by Imperials that I knew, and in some part trusted with my safety, even if the thought makes him squirm. Alisyad was there, Par, Jenn, Cari, Davyn, some others from my squad, so it was not just us. MASC provided the entertainment for the evening with a long dancing line as a highlight.

Life Day we took some time to bring a bit of comfort to 'our' refugees. I was caught by a little scamp, a boy, empath. He is one I had noticed once before, mute, but I am not sure why. He can project and is a strong reader. There might be more to him. His family is loving and he makes friends easily enough. I forgot where Rando said they were originally from, but they had claimed a farm close to Agathon. Hopefully soon we can get them home again.

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Re: Shoals

Post by Smallcorners » Mon Jan 07, 2019 12:54 am

The sheet is of a stock not used before, there is a stack of it in the box with the rest of the written journal.

I should have written earlier, always so much happening, and nothing at all.

Ghaal showed up on Chandrila, spent some time watching us, more time than would be casual. Rando confronted him, told him to back off or face being arrested. Ghaal left, but the next day a warrant appeared for Rando's arrest from the Major. It took a few days before they met, the major and he to discuss...things.

A few days that we were not together, mostly my fault, not wanting to feedback off if him as we were both already stressed. Partly his desire that no matter who hunts us, that we not be taken together. I am thinking that apart is worse. The warrant is gone now, as Alisyad said, it was meant to get his attention.

I spent most of that time visiting Ivu, staying in our home. I did the laundry, dusted,the few things that I did not get a chance when we were there for the festival. I spent time in the rain and the river letting Dantooine wash over me.

Did I mention meeting another force sensitive? Qualnar. He is on the path, the proper path, though I should check in with him again soon. The Will does not like one of us running around alone, I should know.

I will write more later, but I am exhausted and Rando is heavily bruised from our mission last night. I hate battle droids so much.

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