A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

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EccentricM
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A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

Post by EccentricM » Mon Feb 10, 2020 9:00 am

Log Title:Recovery

#Entry 1

"It's been a few days now, or weeks? I can't remember that well. Still having the same dreams, and still can't remember all the things that Inquisitor said, or did...

I think I'm recovering pretty ok though, I guess. The last talk I had with the Lieutenant Colonel (why do all these titles have to be so long) was pretty good. Between her, Sentator Iko, and the others so far, they've helped me see through the lies that guy put in my head about the Republic. But, even now there's something there telling me not to trust them, that it's all a lie, but... the Force tells me different, and that doesn't lie, they are telling the truth to me. If it wasn't for that I don't know what I'd do or where I'd be, or who to look to.


Still, the other stuff he said, about being able to use the Darkside for good, maybe that wasn't lies? Or maybe it's just more of the "brainwashing" he did to me...

I know Cari, Zarek and Nevine warned against it, and I know they are not lying to me, but maybe they were lied to? Or maybe are just following what those old Jedi books said? I mean it's not like it's the first time the Jedi could have been wrong, or made mistakes, maybe this teaching is one of them? Just like how they randomly said one day that all emotions and attachments were bad.

I remember that Defender guy I met, back on Chandrilla, and he seemed like a good guy, and used the Darkside as well as the Lightside. Maybe I'll try find em one day, and see if he can teach me anything else, and make up my own mind... I wonder what Cari meant before when she said she knew how to put thoughts in people's heads and do stuff to their minds, like the Inquisitor could... yet she told me not to use the Darkside, maybe she just did in the past and doesn't say anything about it. I guess I'll ask her when I see her again.

I tried to contact Bywing, but he's not answering back anymore, must focused on that secret mission I guess. But it's not like he wanted to carry on teaching me anyway, said I wasn't "dedicated" enough to the rules. But maybe he was right... that Inquisitor used my emotions against me... I don't know anymore, maybe it will just take time.

I hope Lieutenant Colonel Mina speaks to me again soon, waiting around in this base for days gets pretty dull, pretty fast. But at least my leg seems to be getting better, I don't have to keep wearing those sticky bacta patches anymore now.
"
Last edited by EccentricM on Tue Feb 18, 2020 9:11 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

Post by EccentricM » Fri Feb 14, 2020 2:44 pm

#Entry 2

"Nevine came today. It was good to see another friendly face whilst waiting around in here.

I wonder if we'll get any further with those meditation sessions and make sense of those pictures that keep flashing in my head. Still can only remember those red flashing lights and those emotions frightened people, and anger... Maybe the next time we do, we'll get further, because it's still not making that much sense.

Still no word from the Lt so far either, I guess they're busy.
"
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Re: A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

Post by EccentricM » Mon Feb 17, 2020 10:25 pm

#Entry 3

"It's great to be rid of those emotions and thoughts now. Who knew General Anishor could use the Force? Force Light.. never heard of that before today. Now I've got my new stuff I just gotta wait on the requisition of my new B-Wing, hopefully it won't take long, and I can head back to the others.

Still having trouble remembering what happened though, maybe Nevine can still help with that.

Speaking of my B-Wing, I wonder where my old one was taken and what Rosika wanted with it, maybe she's just trying to make me follow her...
"
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Re: A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

Post by EccentricM » Tue Feb 18, 2020 8:41 pm

#Entry 3

"Now I'm finally back here, I can get back to training. I think I'm gonna stay on leave from my pilot duties a while and focus here, unless it's urgent I guess.

No sign of that Sith holocron, guess Zarek put it away somewhere where it can't be found, still I might be able to find that Defender anyway. But it's time I focused more on these other holocrons and what I can learn. A couple of em seem to be teaching how to stop Force powers being used on people, and after what I've been through it doesn't sound like a half bad idea to learn how to do. The holocron of this Jedi chick called "Pertinax" seems to be a pretty good bet, she's a pretty grumpy person, but she sure knows a lot about how to resist powers and fight against the Darkside, so it's one of those worthwhile trade offs.

If the others are around later maybe I'll ask em if they know how to do this "Supression" as well, but I still wanna focus on the other stuff they were teaching me too, so maybe I'll just keep learning this on my own in my spare time when not learning other stuff with them.

At least Fou was around to say hi to me, that and that Wookiee I've never seen before, Fou said he was called Jowtobuk, coudln't understand a word he was saying. But at least now I have a translator from Levden, should come in pretty handy!
"
Last edited by EccentricM on Thu Feb 20, 2020 2:43 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

Post by EccentricM » Thu Feb 20, 2020 2:32 am

#Entry 4

"Finally saw the others today. Hopefully Nevine will start those sessions with me soon. Those dreams are still there, even though that dark taint and those feelings I had are gone.

I guess that's the real power and.. danger of the Darkside for you... and after what Cari told me, and her experiences, maybe it is a bad idea to think about using the Darkside afterall. Seems the Jedi ways might to be right afterall, at least on this part... I guess it is what the first Jedi, even the ones with attachments still believed too...

But maybe I'll still see what the Defender has to say and show about it, maybe I'll even mention Cari's experience too, and see what he thinks. And if he's just lying, I'll make sure to try and find out... though I guess it won't help if he's just.. misguided... the deeper I get into this Force stuff the more complicated it gets, and I thought it would be the other way around.

It kinda bothers me what the others said today though, about some people being able to trick your senses, and block you from feeling what they're really thinking or feeling... because it's been the Force that I've relied on to get me through all this and know who to trust... I guess like they said, I can't just rely on one thing, and have to try and get to know people the old fashioned way too, and to still be extra careful.

Other than that, everything seems pretty great, well other than Zarek seeming to have vanished I guess. First Bywing, now him. Hopefully we'll hear something soon.
"
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Re: A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

Post by EccentricM » Fri Mar 27, 2020 1:22 pm

#Entry 5

"Can't believe my luck, or maybe the Force, that he actually came here! After talking with Rethon I got lots to think about with that Darkside stuff. I think things are becoming clearer to me...

I wonder if he'll stick around long enough to teach me more things, it was good to get back to learning some more Shien again. Seems everyone else is real busy these days, but at least I've had that Padawan girl to speak to now and again.
"
Last edited by EccentricM on Fri Mar 27, 2020 1:35 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

Post by EccentricM » Fri Mar 27, 2020 1:27 pm

#Entry 6

"Finally I've got the hang of Supression! Took a long time to finally get it, over a month... I thought after a while I wouldn't be able to take any more of that Pertinax's constant bad mood.

Still, she knows a lot of useful stuff, so maybe I'll keep seeing what I can learn, or even the other holocrons. If I wanna be ready for taking on people like the Inqusistors.. the Sith, or whoever else might be out there I gotta train hard, no slacking!
"
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Re: A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

Post by EccentricM » Thu Apr 30, 2020 3:17 am

#Entry 7

"Training hard, I'm even getting better at performing some the basic stuff I learned!

Everyone seems to be pretty busy, hopefully Nevine will still come by eventually... I hope she hasn't forgot. In the meantime learning how to hide myself in the Force from Pertinax is gonna be something pretty useful I figure. It's already way harder to try and get the hang of than the last thing I learned from her. Why do I get the feeling this is gonna take me a real long time...? Or maybe it just feels like it's gonna be long with miss stick up her ass...
"
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Re: A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

Post by EccentricM » Tue Oct 06, 2020 9:50 am

#Entry 8

"I finally got the hang of it! Took forever, but at least now I won't be a holo-target for any of those Inquisitors hangin' around the galaxy. Now you see me, now you don't!

But can't stop here, still got plenty more stuff to learn. Ah, a Jedi's work is never done... at least it feels that way. All part of the life I guess!
".
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Re: A Clouded Aftermath [Qualnar's Datapad Journal]

Post by EccentricM » Tue Oct 06, 2020 10:04 am

#Entry98

"I can hide from the Darksiders now, but they still got eyes. One of the holocrons are teaching how to clear and protect your mind, and with what I went through, I think that's not too bad of an idea to learn how to do...

At least this time I won't have to deal with such a party pooper like Pertinax. This big guy is way more happier, my type of Jedi for sure! Pretty surprising actually for a guy who's a librarian. Well, back to the grind I guess.
".
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